I recently signed up for Netflix, and started watching a bunch of random movies via the instant-watching feature. Here are some summaries of random movies I've watched in the past couple weeks (they're not necessarily recent releases, just ones I never got around to watching).
Phenomenon
John Travolta smiles too much, gets random superpowers, has a really awkward "romance" scene, turns out to not nearly be as cool as first thought.
Underworld: Rise of the Lycans
Same as the other Underworld movies. Fake Kate Beckinsale. Still kind of hot.
Paul Blart: Mall Cop
As disappointing as my gut told me it would be. How is it that people were saying,"It's actually not that bad..."?
Seven Pounds
Will Smith stalks a bunch of people creepily. Turns out to be helping them all at his own expense.
Defiance
A bunch of Jews hide from Nazis in a forest. Some really horrible acting ensues. The big brother from X-Men Origins: Wolverine is there, also is impossible to take seriously. Nothing gets resolved in the movie.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Jim Carrey, Elijah Wood, Kate Winslet, Kirsten Dunst... All-star cast of actors I fucking hate. Never had a chance.
The Wrestler
Not nearly as cool as everybody made it seem. Pimple-faced white boys would love it.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Gratuity
When you eat a restaurant, it's easy to overlook the fact that the server running around with your food is working pretty damn hard to ensure you have an enjoyable eating experience. They seem a little rushed? It's probably because they are. Are they being a little rude? Maybe they had a really bad customer give them a hard time just before they got to your table. They forget an item on your order? People make mistakes, and the world seems to go on just fine.
There's nothing more annoying than a stingy tipper. Believe me, many people around me are really tight with their tip. They justify it with excuse after excuse, but it really is just that they're cheap. Let's say you pick up a tab for two that came out to a reasonable $40 after tax. I personally would leave, at a minimum, $50 total. It's a healthy 25% tip, it makes the server immensely happier, and I leave with the satisfaction of knowing that they will remember me when I return (and that the favor will be returned to me). Too many people would sit there, calculate out the 15%, and leave that $6 instead. Better yet, they'll round down to $45. Aside from making you look like the cheapest motherfucker to walk into the restaurant that night, you really only save $4-5. Is it really worth it? If you can't afford to throw in a few more dollars on top of your meal, why not stick to Burger King the next time you feel like going out?
I'll gladly leave a 30%, 40%, even 50% tip on a meal, especially if it's a quick bite for just myself. For that small premium, I get to walk out feeling good, not embarrassed and eager to get away ASAP. I also get to return and be greeted by a server who remembers me, not pray and hope she isn't working at the time.
Take it from a guy who worked at a restaurant for three years in college: 15% is the absolute bare minimum you should ever leave at a restaurant. 20% is not "excessive", it's standard. Leave a bad tip, and the servers will remember you, and you will be treated worse when you return. Really, the savings isn't worth it. Don't be fucking cheap.
There's nothing more annoying than a stingy tipper. Believe me, many people around me are really tight with their tip. They justify it with excuse after excuse, but it really is just that they're cheap. Let's say you pick up a tab for two that came out to a reasonable $40 after tax. I personally would leave, at a minimum, $50 total. It's a healthy 25% tip, it makes the server immensely happier, and I leave with the satisfaction of knowing that they will remember me when I return (and that the favor will be returned to me). Too many people would sit there, calculate out the 15%, and leave that $6 instead. Better yet, they'll round down to $45. Aside from making you look like the cheapest motherfucker to walk into the restaurant that night, you really only save $4-5. Is it really worth it? If you can't afford to throw in a few more dollars on top of your meal, why not stick to Burger King the next time you feel like going out?
I'll gladly leave a 30%, 40%, even 50% tip on a meal, especially if it's a quick bite for just myself. For that small premium, I get to walk out feeling good, not embarrassed and eager to get away ASAP. I also get to return and be greeted by a server who remembers me, not pray and hope she isn't working at the time.
Take it from a guy who worked at a restaurant for three years in college: 15% is the absolute bare minimum you should ever leave at a restaurant. 20% is not "excessive", it's standard. Leave a bad tip, and the servers will remember you, and you will be treated worse when you return. Really, the savings isn't worth it. Don't be fucking cheap.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Metrosexuals
A few years ago, being a "metrosexual" was in. Suddenly, men discovered that they, too, could dress to impress. Designer jeans became commonplace for men, guys began to pay more than ten dollars for a haircut, and the world saw the birth of the overall better-dressed man.
Today, the term "metrosexual" is as common as stating you like burgers and fries; to dress "metrosexual" is what's considered normal. Men as a whole have come to accept the more daring fashion choices being taken by their fellow brothers.
What amazes me is that there are still a plenty good number of men who refuse to accept this "movement". Call it whatever the fuck you'd like, but a real man knows how to keep himself cleaned-up and presentable. To say,"I don't care about my clothes, I'm a man." is a pathetic excuse for not having the confidence it takes to throw on an outfit that will grab the attention of more women.
Let's put it this way: if, by putting on nicer clothes, you begin to question your heterosexuality, then you've got a problem. I can wear a slim-fitted pink shirt and maintain the confidence and swagger I'd carry wearing a wifebeater and jeans. If you can't say the same, then continue buying your $15 jeans at Target, and keep telling yourself that you're "the man". Meanwhile, us "queers" will be out getting all the women. Cheers, tough guy.
Today, the term "metrosexual" is as common as stating you like burgers and fries; to dress "metrosexual" is what's considered normal. Men as a whole have come to accept the more daring fashion choices being taken by their fellow brothers.
What amazes me is that there are still a plenty good number of men who refuse to accept this "movement". Call it whatever the fuck you'd like, but a real man knows how to keep himself cleaned-up and presentable. To say,"I don't care about my clothes, I'm a man." is a pathetic excuse for not having the confidence it takes to throw on an outfit that will grab the attention of more women.
Let's put it this way: if, by putting on nicer clothes, you begin to question your heterosexuality, then you've got a problem. I can wear a slim-fitted pink shirt and maintain the confidence and swagger I'd carry wearing a wifebeater and jeans. If you can't say the same, then continue buying your $15 jeans at Target, and keep telling yourself that you're "the man". Meanwhile, us "queers" will be out getting all the women. Cheers, tough guy.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Women
To my few faithful readers out there, thank you for checking in on this seemingly-never-updated blog. What with a bit of a relocation, a new job, and discovery of Left 4 Dead, I've found myself with little time to update this blog. What once was a nearly-every-day routine, I've apparently abandoned, much like working out and masturbating. On second thought, just working out.
Narissist that I am, it took a good read through my own recent posts to compell me to write again; and it took my post about the nature of dudes to help me come up with this logical followup on the nature of the "fairer" sex. All that intro aside, let's dive right in...
All women are prostitutes by nature.
Men and women alike have been seeking better and better mates for as long as mankind has been walking this planet. As living things, we have the inherent desire to sustain our species-more specifically, our own family lines- for as long as possible. To that end, men seek the prettiest possible mates. Why? Because a better looking woman is more likely to be healthier, and thus more capable of nursing and providing for the family line that the man is attempting to progress. What, then, do women look for? The most attractive mate as well, right? Well, not necessarily...
Of the two sexes, men are the natural leaders. Fuck feminism, the cold hard truth is that men are physically designed to lead in a social setting. Then, to build upon her family tree, a woman needs a good leader to mate with. A leader will guide their offspring in the correct direction, increasing his chances of survival. And what better indication of ability to lead than wealth? Surely, the leaders of today's world are the wealthy. Women are thus hard-wired to chase after wealth. They don't logically chart out the reasoning described here (although... maybe some do...), but they certainly find themselves seeking men with more money. Are you a woman who believes she's different? Oh, here's an idea: BULLSHIT. Every single woman would fuck the world's ugliest man for a trillion dollars. That's fucking fact. Hell, I bet MOST women would sleep with a half-decent guy for a few thousand bucks. (Unfortunately, I don't have the money, legal freedom, and personal liberty required to test this theory.)
But let me make one thing clear: I don't see any big problem with being a bunch of sluts. Hell, if I was a woman, I'd be the hugest slut ever. I mean, how great would it be? I can have sex AND make money. I'd be one of those "high-classed" escorts who only has a very limited client book. I'd eat great food, have tons of sex, and just be rolling in cash. Sigh, girls have it easy.
Narissist that I am, it took a good read through my own recent posts to compell me to write again; and it took my post about the nature of dudes to help me come up with this logical followup on the nature of the "fairer" sex. All that intro aside, let's dive right in...
All women are prostitutes by nature.
Men and women alike have been seeking better and better mates for as long as mankind has been walking this planet. As living things, we have the inherent desire to sustain our species-more specifically, our own family lines- for as long as possible. To that end, men seek the prettiest possible mates. Why? Because a better looking woman is more likely to be healthier, and thus more capable of nursing and providing for the family line that the man is attempting to progress. What, then, do women look for? The most attractive mate as well, right? Well, not necessarily...
Of the two sexes, men are the natural leaders. Fuck feminism, the cold hard truth is that men are physically designed to lead in a social setting. Then, to build upon her family tree, a woman needs a good leader to mate with. A leader will guide their offspring in the correct direction, increasing his chances of survival. And what better indication of ability to lead than wealth? Surely, the leaders of today's world are the wealthy. Women are thus hard-wired to chase after wealth. They don't logically chart out the reasoning described here (although... maybe some do...), but they certainly find themselves seeking men with more money. Are you a woman who believes she's different? Oh, here's an idea: BULLSHIT. Every single woman would fuck the world's ugliest man for a trillion dollars. That's fucking fact. Hell, I bet MOST women would sleep with a half-decent guy for a few thousand bucks. (Unfortunately, I don't have the money, legal freedom, and personal liberty required to test this theory.)
But let me make one thing clear: I don't see any big problem with being a bunch of sluts. Hell, if I was a woman, I'd be the hugest slut ever. I mean, how great would it be? I can have sex AND make money. I'd be one of those "high-classed" escorts who only has a very limited client book. I'd eat great food, have tons of sex, and just be rolling in cash. Sigh, girls have it easy.
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