It's not delivery, it's GoFuckYourself

Lately, I've been either not eating or getting fast food when I can't bear the hunger.

Today, I decided to bake myself a nice DiGiorno pizza. When I got home from the supermarket, I realized a couple things that I hate about it. First, it takes a full half hour to bake (seriously? I can get a $5 pizza from Domino's in half the time). Second, this (click on the image to view full-size):

Not pictured: Me sobbing uncontrollably.

Yeah, apparently it was necessary for DiGiorino remind me that: a) I'm alone and b) I eat like a fat fuck.

Fuck you, DiGiorno.

Quarter-life crisis

Unless, through some miracle in science, I live to be over a hundred years old, I'm already well beyond the quarter-point in my life. That would mean I've lived long enough to earn my right to a twice-in-a-lifetime personal "crisis"... and you can believe I'm exercising that right. Lately, all I can think about is adventure. Yeah, the same word that gets a six-year-old into all kinds of mischievous trouble. I've come to a point where my life lacks that crucial bit of "something else" that keeps me interested in what's in store for me every day. I actually use the snooze button now. I wake up later. I shave less. I don't care that I'm forming a bit of a gut. Frankly, I don't quite give a shit.

The beauty of having these pivotal "crisis" moments in life is that they give you an excuse to do some incredibly stupid shit. Like getting tattoos, leaving your family to live with a bunch of animals on a farm, shaving your head, quitting your job, picking up smoking... all kinds of shit you never really had the balls to do before. For me, that's getting a motorcycle. Keep in mind that I'm a maniac on the roads as it is. I'm the idiot who has to be first when the light turns green on a freeway on-ramp. I'm the idiot who refuses to let people cut in front of me when I'm about to exit a freeway. I'm the idiot who'll honk and yell at any poor fool who happens to be going slower than me in the fast lane. And in a few months, I'll be the idiot who ends up on the side of the road with his lower torso a few hundred feet beyond that. And, you guessed it, I'm the idiot who doesn't care.

Even so much as a year ago, I had this fear of death... That self-preserving instinct was able to talk me out of stupid shit like riding motorcycles. Now? The pain of a crash would be a welcome reminder that I'm still alive. I must clarify that I'm most definitely not suicidal. I'm not ready to die, and I think too damn highly of myself to wish for it. No, certainly not suicidal. For lack of a better word, I'm bitter. I see too many people, who lack the slightest inkling of talent, in a better place in life than I am, only because they were in the right place at the right fucking time. Yeah, this is where I pout like a little kid and say it's not fucking fair. I've worked too fucking hard and struggled too goddamn much to still be dreaming about the red Dodge Viper I fell in love with as a kid. I've done too damn much to still be taking orders from a corporation that shows me absolutely no loyalty and favor in return. Yeah, I'm high on myself - but that doesn't make any of it untrue.

I'm tired of a lot of things. I'm tired of people so much as trying to start conversation with me. I'm tired of people trying to tell me how I should and shouldn't be. I'm tired of people brilliantly pointing out my obvious shortcomings. I guess I'm sick of people. Period. At the end of the day, I'd rather be alone with my music than out with my friends. Is that depressing? I suppose that means I'm depressed. For what it's worth, I need a change of pace. I need a new career, I need a new lifestyle, I need to get out of this filthy hovel they call Los Angeles. If only I had the means to get up and leave. At this point, I figure, hell... why not?

... 50's not far off. Maybe then.

Pre-existing Conditions

A term becoming increasingly commonplace is "pre-existing condition". In the healthcare realm, this refers to a health problem that a person has prior to signing up for private healthcare insurance.

More and more, you see articles describing horror stories that people have with regards to their insurance companies and their pre-existing conditions. Sure, they definitely make you feel bad for these people, but to paint insurance companies in a bad light because of that is a fucking cheap shot. These private companies' business models depend on the very basic idea of taking on the risks associated with peoples' healthcare and appropriately pricing their coverage to mitigate that risk. If you're sick and try to trick an insurance company into footing your costly bills, and then they refuse to help you out when they figure this all out, who's to blame?

How can the Obama and the public at large demand that health insurance providers provide the same coverage regardless of pre-existing conditions? That's like saying you can drive without insurance, crash your car, then call up GEICO and tell them you're going to pay a $200 monthly bill and that you'd like your $50,000 car repaired immediately. That's like being forced to accept a bet on the losing team after the game has ended. Sure, it sucks for the uninsured, but does it really make sense to call the insurance companies bad people for not covering people who are already sick? The government should spend less money on fucking retarded programs like Cars for Clunkers, and use that money to help the few people who are in genuinely messed up situations that cannot be helped otherwise.

Now, I do think it's shitty that you hear about companies dropping insurance coverage instead of covering bills for customers who grow ill after successfully signing up for insurance coverage. In those cases, sure, it's messed up that these companies refuse to man up to the loss they took on that particular bet. But for the most part, there's too much fucking bullshit bitching and moaning about companies simply going about business the way business has been done for centuries before.

Fuck all these tear-jerker stories about sick people being "screwed over" by insurance companies. They should have started off paying the few bucks a day it costs to have insurance coverage to begin with. It's really their own damn fault that they're sick and assed out.